Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Bacon bits

One day at the Francis Bacon shop:

Manager: I’m not happy with the way our Bacon product is going out the door.

Assistant 1: Sales sure are slow. Like we printed 20,000 of those postcards with his signature on them and we’ve still got 19,998 on the shelves. 

Assistant 2: Same with the triptych hankie sets.

M: OK. We need something more snappy. A little more Francis.

A1: How about a nice black tie with the website address in blue?

A2: Or a small book of FB’s quotes?

M: Quotes eh…that’s not bad. We could put them on stuff like coffee mugs.

A1: Hang on, I’ll get a quote book and look him up. 
(a few moments later)Here you go, “All painting is an accident.”

M: Good for kitchen towels maybe, but coffee mugs? Not so much.

A2: (leaning over book) “I believe in deeply ordered chaos.” Surely our customers would respond to that idea?

M: While they're drinking coffee? I don’t think so.

A1: How about this? “You’re born, you fuck, you die.”

M: Genius. Let’s do it.