Thursday, March 20, 2014

One day in the Directors office

Director: I’m getting a lot of pressure from up the line to increase attendances.
 

Curator:  More kids
 

Marketing: Kids
 

Education: Same
 

D: No, no we can’t go through the 80/20 barrier we need something else to get adults in.
 

C: A history show?
 

D: (ignores her) Any ideas?
 

E: Free beer on tap?
 

D: Budget
 

M: Food hall?
 

D: Not bad but a bit too nineties RA
 

C: How about drawing the crowds with an extreme artwork?
 

M: A what? (aside “you’ve got to be kidding me”)
 

D: (resigned) ok, ok let’s hear what you’ve got.
 

C: A collective that fill the gallery with condoms inflated with laughing gas and gets the audience to burst them with pins
 

D: Health and safety issues 

C: OK then, a guy who sands himself with an electric sander on behalf of a favourite charity inside the gallery
 

D: Not with the cleaners' strike we've got on he won't
 

C: A sniper shooting high velocity bullets across the gallery at unsuspecting visitors
 

D: A real sniper?
 

C: Sure, certified Navy SEAL
 

D: And the gun?
 

C: I’m thinking high-powered 30-caliber rifle. Maybe a Tactical 308
 

D: Let’s do it
 

M: I’m not so sure about the marketing angle
 

D: Huh?
 

M: You know …  um … people getting in the way of bullets .... collateral damage .... bodies.
 

D: (exasperated) Ok ok then. Shoot something else then

So they did.


(Thanks for the head's up C)